Week Links [20 February]

Happy (very belated) Valentimes! I’ve never been much for this particular holiday, since I hate candy, cold weather, and obligations generally, but a cozy Valentine’s Day at home this year is just what the doctor ordered. This was my eighth V-Day with my husband, if such a thing is to be said. He shares my general sentiment (he’s even more of a Grinch than I am; he’d forget his birthday and Christmas if I didn’t remind him), but he knocked our first Valentine’s Day out of the park. We saw Nicole Atkins at Brighton Music Hall, and it remains one of the best shows I’ve ever been to. Quick tangent: Nicole is one of the finest singer-songwriters on the planet, in addition to being SO NICE in person.

i found this on twitter and have no idea who to credit it with, but it is the best thing i’ve ever seen

In other news, the entire country is frozen. I’m from Massachusetts, so winter storms are par for the course and we have the infrastructure to deal with them. My heart aches for the Southern states who weren’t prepared for this climate catastrophe, and whose leaders are incompetent, hypocritical assholes who don’t care whether their constituents live or die (looking at you, Ted Cruz). One of my favorite comedians, Jen Kirkman, put together an amazing thread of all the ways to help Texas. I feel very, very grateful to be where I am right now, and also to have a husband who does all the shoveling and snow maintenance.

image source

Today (2/20) would also be Kurt Cobain’s 54th birthday. I’m a lifelong Nirvana stan (literally lifelong; Nevermind came out almost exactly a month after I was born), so I always get reflective on this day, as well as on April 5th (the day he passed). He had only just turned 27 when he died (two and a half years younger than I am now!) but in his short life absolutely changed the world. I’m tempted to say he was ahead of his time, but he wasn’t…he was living in the present while the rest of the world languished in the past. Happy birthday, king.

With all that being said, stay warm and safe and listen to some Nirvana today.

  1. Re: the above, I bought myself this t-shirt.
  2. I cannot tell a lie: the Always Pan is worth 100% of the hype. I just bought a second one (although in retrospect, I should have gotten the Dinner for 4 bundle). The pan going to be my new go-to gift for friends. And as soon as the lavender comes back in stock, one of my parents will be #blessed with a hand-me-down.
  3. I’ve been loving In the FLO by Alicia Vitti. My psychiatrist actually recommended it to me, since she knows my ultimate goal is to get in sync with my body and be on as little medication as possible. The term “biohack” makes me want to vomit, but the author makes clear that she doesn’t mean it in the tech bro way. I’d never even heard of the infradian rhythm! Obviously boo biological essentialism and sex ≠ gender, but I’m also sick and fucking tired of the fact that all of our conventional knowledge and medical studies are based on male bodies.
  4. I’m rewatching Gossip Girl on HBO Max because I have zero respect for myself (actually it’s because the girl I tutor was assigned to read the book in her Y.A. Lit class). I watched it for the first time when I about 24, having missed the boat in my teen years, and it’s amazing how much my perspective has changed in the intervening time (I’ll be 30 in 6 months). The show is…VERY CAVALIER about sexual assault in a way that cannot have been healthy for my generation to watch. However, for each troubling moment, there is one equally joyful and iconic, such as the fact that, canonically, Lily van der Woodsen has slept with both Trent Reznor and Slash.
  5. I’m excited to dive into this book. I’ve really enjoyed this one so far, and sorry not sorry, but I’m one of those annoying people that thinks Europeans do everything better than us.
  6. If I’m not careful, I’m just going to replace all the furniture in my house with poufs.
  7. This tweet lives rent-free in my mind.
  8. I searched vintage glassware on Etsy on a complete whim and found this set of floral glasses. They match a juice pitcher that belonged to my husband’s late grandmother almost perfectly! They were extremely close, so I’m excited to be able to display this sweet little trip down memory lane. The rest of the shop has super cute stuff for great prices.
  9. These handmade dolls are so.freaking.cute. I also love these and these. Today’s kids have the coolest stuff.
  10. Definitely getting this rug for my “second bedroom.”

What’s in my cart?

By which, I of course mean, what’s currently being shipped to my house. Your girl did some shoppin‘ this week! I always spend way too much money this time of year (the sales are just too good!), and my husband and I have been talking about doing a no-spend month (or 2, or 12…he’s so good with money and I am…not), so I went a little nuts in preparation. I’m starting a new job in a couple of weeks, which means I actually get to dress like a person again (no shade to the retail/food service industries, but I’ve done it for 12 years, I deserve to look cute at work)! I’m joyfully unpacking all of my business casual clothing from my last office job and I *might* do a ceremonial burning of some of my ratty work clothes soon.

Here’s what I’ve been checking out lately!

On Santa’s Sleigh

J.Crew

I’ve been a die-hard J.Crew girl for years and years, through the Jenna Lyons era and unto the breach. Even though not every season perfectly matches my aesthetic, J.Crew makes great quality clothes and they’re always having wild sales. In the past few weeks I’ve bought this green dress (still on sale and available in every size!), this jumpsuit, these amazing pants, and these stunning sandals before they sold out, along with some other great work staples!

I especially love J.Crew for men’s clothing—my husband is allergic to shopping and would 100% wear ill-fitting pants he’s had since the ’90s and band t-shirts every day if left to his own devices. J.Crew’s pants fit him so well (he is #blessed with a great metabolism). I scored 3 pairs of pants for less than the retail of 1 yesterday—merry Christmas to him!

Madewell

How is Madewell not sponsoring me by this point? I’m just free advertisement. I would say that a majority of my closet is Madewell—their clothes truly are made well, and last. Their leather bags are buttery-soft and incredible. I just snagged these tops—love a wrap, gingham, and a square neck!—and this jumpsuit, which I’m aware is criminally extra.

I’m eyeing this coat, this kimono jacket (all leopard everything), these Chelsea boots, this skirt (I have it in pink!), and this jumpsuit.

BlissBranch

I don’t know if I’ve ever talked about BlissBranch on here, but it’s an awesome (and very reasonably priced!) online vintage store that was recently relaunched! I treated myself to some wide-leg pants, and a couple of gorgeous vintage dresses. This week, use the coupon code 15FORME to get 15% off your purchase!

Everlane

I love Everlane so much. This winter, I finally caved and got a weather-appropriate parka (only took me 27 years), and the Tank Bra in every. damn. color. These flats are definitely on my Christmas list, and the Day Heel and Boot need to join my closet ASAP.

xo

-c

Stylin’ On ‘Em

Good evening, all! Lately, I’ve been in complete get-shit-done mode. We’re streamlining our department at work in preparation for the busy fall season, my home is starting to come together inch by inch, and my financial aid picture for returning to college is looking considerably less grim. And, as a person who is about to graduate and get married (ew, so traditional), I’ve been thinking a lot about the personal style I want to carry with me into this new frontier of adulthood.

I consigned clothing both Monday and Friday. The first place I went to paid me $19 up front for 6 items of my clothes, which is insane, because I brought two baskets of well-maintained garments. We all know how much of a brand ho I can be, so I was discouraged that they accepted a sundress from Target, but not myriad garments from places like J.Crew and Urban Outfitters. The second consignment store follows a different buying model, and I’ve had a lot of success over the years selling to them. They donate unaccepted garments to charity, so either way, I win.

There are two reasons for the wardrobe pare-down. One is that my 24th birthday is fast-approaching, and the urge to cultivate a more professional and adult wardrobe is real. With each day that I age, neutrals become more appealing. Neutrals are everything—essential to creating an all-seasons wardrobe. I feel like my personal aesthetic has been completely schizophrenic over the years. From October to April I live in Banana Republic sweaters, skinny jeans, and boots (i.e. Webster’s definition of “basic”). The rest of the year, I exist in this space between bohemian, retro, and preppy that lacks cohesion. I still don’t feel like I fully know who I am as a dresser—just part of the process of growing up.

The second reason is minimalism in my home, which has been admittedly less than successful. You see, the only way to declutter is to NOT immediately replace clothes that you just got rid of with new, higher-end clothes. I was actually able to reduce the number of drawers I was using for clothing. They are now anal-retentively reorganized by category, and I’m making tiny signs to hang on the drawer pulls because my life is a sad parody of a Pinterest board.

Styling/redecorating my house has been such a challenge, but it seems like Michael is finally coming around about it. He is very open to any and all changes I make to communal areas, but his office and studio are sanctuaries that I barely feel allowed to enter, much less rework entirely. In the past week, I feel we’ve made a lot of progress.

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This is the “after” picture of our entryway (or at least the :to be continued”). On the left is the door to our bedroom, on the right is the hallway to the front door. I don’t have a “before” picture, and be grateful—it was truly horrible. There was a tall cabinet whose top was not only broken off and balanced on top, but was covered in random clutter (including, but not limited to, 5 year old Christmas cards and coffee cup sleeves). There was also an (ugly) table lamp up there, which has been moved to the bedroom and awaits a new shade. The 4 ft or so of wall above was bare with an old nail sticking out. I replaced the cabinet with a small vintage bureau that my dad thrifted for me, a standing lamp with an updated shade, a wall calendar of vintage advertisements, and record covers as hanging art. The records I found used 2 for $1 at Newbury Comics, and I couldn’t be more excited to represent Linda Ronstadt and Elton John in my living room. I painted the clothespins turquoise as a fun pop of color against the hideous wall, which has to remain this tortured beige for the time being. Boo.

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Chelsea, Michael, and Della, for those wondering about the letters.

The entry-way joins this cozy reading corner, which I created earlier in the summer…

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top: Whitney Houston’s debut album, center: naughty vintage “pulp fiction” literary postcards right: a painting we received as a gift from New Orleans

…this budding gallery wall, hung this week…

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..and this area, which I “finished” last week by finally hanging my Sherri’s Ink art print, my Man Ray photo (cut from a calendar!) and our “engagement photo”, which will be replaced once we have a real one taken.

My living room is about 70% finished (and by finished, I mean in a state that I can live with until I afford to do a proper overhaul) and it’s super encouraging. I’ve been spending a lot of  time in this room because it feels so much more put-together than the rest of the house that it’s became a calming oasis.

As always, thank you for letting me share my progress. It’s no Happy Handmade Home yet, but it’s getting there.

-DellaBites