Gadget Gift Guide

Full disclosure—I am about the least tech-y person on earth. I didn’t even get a Kindle until like two years ago. However, boy, do I love a gadget! This gift guide could really apply to any kind of person, but given that I own at least a version of every single item on here, it is pretty tailored to a person…exactly like me. But, in fairness, don’t we all have a basic, millennial white woman in our lives? The prices range from $15 – $150, so whether you’re doing a Secret Santa or buying for a significant other, I’ve got your back!

For the Kitchen

  1. Dash Egg Cooker ($) – I’m obsessed with this thing! It makes perfect soft or hard-boiled eggs every time in minutes, and it comes with attachments to make egg patties for breakfast sandwiches or poached eggs. Truly the best $15 you’ll ever spend, unless of course you’re a vegan.
  2. Immersion Blender ($$-$$$)- This is the best thing I’ve ever owned in my life. The KitchenAid version is super budget-friendly and will pay for itself 100 times over. From potato leek soup to bulletproof coffee, this magic stick will puree basically anything, all without dirtying a blender pitcher. I will caution you NOT to try to blend ice cubes with it, though…I learned my lesson the hard way, and now my limited edition pink base has a white blender arm. It’s…colorblocked! If it’s in your budget, I’d opt for this set—everything you could ever need!
  3. Mandoline Slicer ($ – $$$) – I consider myself to have pretty excellent knife skills (thanks, chef Joe G from my former workplace!), but my chops (get it??) don’t come close to what this baby can do. I linked the one I have, but there are tons of options, even some as cheap as $15. So, true story: in my usual hubristic manner, I tried to use this slicer without reading the manual…it was such an epic fail (though I somehow managed not to harm myself!) that I let it sit in a drawer unused for about three years. But I finally braved it again (this time armed with the manual) when I started making these pickled onions and now I am a total convert. Is it just me, or are uniformly sliced vegetables kind of sexy?
  4. Milk Frother ($$) – This is the simplest way for even a home-coffee novice to get gourmet results at home. This is the updated version of the one I have, but there are definitely cheaper options available (this was another wedding registry score). In addition to making lattes/cappuccinos, I use this to make hot chocolate and to reheat my coffee (way more delicious than using the microwave).

For the Bedroom

  1. White Noise Sound Machine ($$) – I am the world’s lightest and worst sleeper. I won’t say this cures all of my ills, but it’s a huge help in blocking both indoor and outdoor sounds that could disturb your sleep. My husband is a night owl (his circadian rhythm is literally vampiric), and I can’t hear him in the house at all when I have this thing going. The model I linked is amazing since it whirs like a fan and has a consistent hum—it’s totally natural and easy to tune out. And it comes in pink, which is the most important thing.
  2. Weighted Blanket ($$) – This doesn’t technically qualify as a gadget, but it’s another must-have for my insomniac brethren. I can’t believe how much it prevents me from tossing and turning. I have this one (throw blanket sized), since my husband hates it and wants it nowhere near him. They come in a variety of weights, at a variety of price points. In a perfect world, I’d have a 30 lb weighted comforter that would basically crush me to death.
  3. Something NSFW ($ – $$$$) – I mean, this is a category of gadgets for the bedroom. Ahem, might I suggest this one? Make sure to do your homework and buy from a feminist, inclusive shop like Babeland or Spectrum Boutique!

For the Home & Office

  1. Light Therapy Lamp ($$) – Do you get crippling seasonal depression when nature steals the sunlight away from us? Then this is the gadget for you! I blast this thing at my face for hours a day, and I think it’s really helping. These come at a variety of price points, but they’re generally really affordable!
  2. Wireless Keyboard ($$) – When I started working from home, my back and neck started killing me from crouching down to work on my laptop 8 hours a day. I got this wireless keyboard and mouse set so that I could set my laptop back on a riser and it’s SO much more comfortable. The best thing about this specific set is that it has all the keys for a Mac and a PC, so it can be used with both.
  3. Bluetooth Speaker ($$$) – Investing in a quality Bluetooth speaker was a game changer for us! We have this one, which follows me from room to room, and this one, which stays centrally-located in our kitchen.
  4. Labelmaker ($$) – For the compulsives and organizers in your life. My labelmaker is what I would save in a house fire. I feel like I don’t even need to explain this one—you get it or you don’t.

For the Ladies

  1. Curling Wand ($$) – The curling wand is the one hair tool I could never live without. The one I use most often was a hand-me-down that retails for only $20, so this is absolutely something you don’t need to spend a lot of money on to get results. I just bought this one and can’t wait to see how it works! The bigger the barrel the looser the curl, but most wands are tapered so you can easily give your curls dimension.
  2. TENS Machine ($$ – $$$$) – *infomercial voice* Do you get debilitating menstrual cramps that make you want to commit a homicide? Then Ovira is for you! There are actually tons of different TENS machines online, some specifically marketed towards people who menstruate. Pain meds like ibuprofen are actually terrible for you and should be avoided if possible—I tend to vomit them up because they upset my stomach—so I was totally game to find an alternate solution to my misery.
  3. IPL Hair-Removal Handset ($$$ – $$$$) – I was a skeptic, but now I’m a believer. I haven’t finished the treatments yet, but I’ve already seen a drastic difference. I know, feminism, hair removal is bad, blah blah blah, but I’m sorry, I’m not going to change in this lifetime. Not having to shave every day will literally add years to my life. This is the one I have, but they’re available for as cheap as $90.
$25 and under$
$50 and under$$
$100 and under$$$
> $100$$$$

Week Links [11 October]

Good morning! Yesterday was World Mental Health Day and my emotional state can confirm! Has anyone else had massive anxiety for about two weeks? RBG’s death followed by literally everyone in the administration getting COVID was the impetus for quite a lot of doom-scrolling. I know I’m not supposed to be happy that *he* got it, and I’m not sure that’s quite the emotion the news inspired, but he has also mismanaged the virus response so egregiously (I consider it tantamount to murder) that over half the amount of Americans that died in WWII have been killed by COVID in less than a year. But remember this time, 4 years ago, when the Access Hollywood tape leaked and we all gleefully thought it had fucked him out of a chance at the presidency? Remember that? If I could bottle that optimism and inject it directly into my veins…

I’ve been listening to a lot of pop music from the early ’00s lately (hello “Pieces of Me” by Ashlee Simpson!), which I’m sure is some sign that I’m emotionally regressing due to stress. After the 2016 election, I drank wine every day and obsessively binged-watched Gilmore Girls, so I’d actually consider this a significant improvement. If the past few years has taught me anything, it’s taught me that we can weather almost any storm and that genuine good can come from tragedy. Can you imagine white people meaningfully discussing police abolition even a couple of years ago? It shouldn’t have taken electing a dangerous fascist/racist/homophobic/misogynist/transphobic/xenophobic administration to get us here, but I can’t see us going back now that we’ve arrived.

All of which is to say that I woke up extremely early this morning and have had a lot of coffee, so I’m cutting myself off from writing anymore about the apocalyptic state of things. Enjoy a martini recipe.

  1. Schitt’s Creek season 6 is on Netflix, on the off-chance that you hadn’t already binged it.
  2. Jester, I have done it again. I’ve always said that the FIRST thing I would do if I ever made real money would be to get laser hair removal from my eyebrows to my toes. Hair removal is a patriarchal scam, blah blah blah, I get it, but as a person with skin so pale it’s translucent and black body hair, removal has eaten away like a third of my life. I have to tweeze my eyebrows and shave my underarms every day. When I did ancestry.com, I’m honestly surprised my results didn’t come back 100% Cro-Magnon or Neanderthal (I’ve…never taken an anthropology course). All of which is to say, though I haven’t hit it big just yet, I have decided to give at-home IPL removal a try. Even if it only delivers 20% of the results it promises, that will still be a huge improvement.
  3. Baking papo secos for the first time today! Portuguese real ones will know.
  4. Would it be psychotic to start using tanning lotion? I’ve heard amazing things about this brand and I think my legs (especially) could really use it.
  5. Mindy Kaling had a surprise baby?! Congratulations to the new mama of two! I’m so excited to read her newest essay collection.
  6. Bowen Yang remains my religion.
  7. Are we all attending Jen Kirkman’s Dysfunctional Christmas Show? I’ve been trying to get to one in LA for years (I have family in LA, jealous???), but the one upside of the pandemic is that I can stream that shit right to my TV!
  8. I’m trying to drink less and ABM publishes this martini recipe? Rude, honestly.
  9. How have I never read this interview with my forever king? I can confirm that at least this Chelsea is a pretty neat person/Birkenstock-wearing kid.
  10. My fourth wedding anniversary is coming up, and while the fourth is pretty irrelevant, the fifth seems pretty significant…needless to say, I’ve been browsing anniversary rings online. I’d like to shop indie/sustainable brands, but it looks like the diamond/white gold combo is très passé, because all the cool companies are doing yellow gold. I did find this delicate cutie on Mejuri, but this is more my speed
  11. And speaking of anniversaries, I just bought our actual anniversary gift. I was going to surprise Michael but I was way too excited!
  12. Finally, I don’t exactly keep my politics close to the vest (see above!), but I feel like it’s so important to reiterate that, despite Biden being very nearly my last choice in the primaries, I am ride or die for Biden-Harris. I’m not optimistic enough to think we’ll have a free and fair election (oh, to be young again!) but it would be shameful to not even try. I vote in person on Election Day because my polling place is awesome and right down the street from me, but not everyone has that luxury. This website breaks down how to register to vote and how to vote in every state. If you’re voting by mail, get that shit in the ballot box yesterday. Make a voting plan, and make sure everyone in your life plans to do the same. Taking ten minutes out of your day could bring us one step closer to defeating the rise of fascism. And it’s not just at the Presidential level–get to know your local candidates and yes, for now, vote blue no matter who.