when baryshnikov doesn’t understand the value of the name necklace? that’s curtains, honey.
Hello again! This week was all about embracing my inner basic. I’ve been bingeing Sex and the City, a show I’ve seen 100 times, I’m waffling as to whether to buy the purple patent leather Miu Miu platform sandals that are so on sale, and the other day I only left the house to stock up on kombucha. It’s…definitely possible that I’m self-soothing because everything in the world is wildly chaotic. We’ll go with that.
I am certainly not what anyone would call *good* with money, but I seldom make luxury purchases. So it is with great pleasure that I announce that I have scored the bag of my dreams, a bag I have fantasized about for YEARS: the Mansur Gavriel bucket bag. The day I just happened to look into procuring one of these, TheRealReal just happened to be 20% sitewide and new shoppers just happened to get a $25 credit and I just happened to find a pink bucket bag in excellent condition for $245. Which means I paid under $200 including shipping and taxes. *insert Beyoncé “God is real” GIF* Did I go back and buy a second smaller one in white on pay day? Don’t come for me! (Update: They both arrived and they couldn’t be in better condition if they were purchased new.)
On the subject of handbags, I have officially reached a new low and am now stalking the Telfar Instagram for news of drops. With god as my witness, I shall have one. (Update: I got one.)
As a rabid fan of Las Culturistas, I feel it is my sworn duty to inform you that Matt Rogers is hosting a new show on HBO Max called Haute Dog. I watched an episode even though I famously dislike dogs. If you, unlike me, actually find dogs endearing, this is the show for you!
I binged Emily in Paris on Netflix and it is not helping me deal with my COVID travel FOMO.
I reactivated Audible to get Mariah Carey’s book. If it’s half as good as Jessica Simpson’s was, it will be a highlight of the year. Oh, and Lenny THEE Kravitz also just dropped a book.
Las Cultch introduced me to Peppermint this week (I don’t watch Drag Race, don’t cancel me), and I can’t stop listening to sensual jam “Best Sex.”
I’m serious. Come to my house, take it away from me, and throw it into a swamp. It has to be a swamp, because I have a deathly fear of alligators and will never attempt to retrieve it.
Being stuck at home all day without diversion is difficult for those of us who are used to being out of the house 10+ hours a day. I am not in any way complaining, of course: I’m so fortunate to live and work where I do. I’m also quarantined with a partner and a pet, so I’m not feeling the strain of a lack of companionship that a lot of people are right now. But it’s been an adjustment. Being at home all day has made me want to streamline and beautify my house, and it’s made me keenly aware of things like, oh, my bras are 5 years old. Things I can normally ignore for a while, like dirty dishes in the sink, become intolerable. Anything that’s not organized by ROYGBIV is an eyesore.
So, I’ve made some purchases. I’m only human (and I need to be loved, just like everybody else does).
Here are all the (nonessential) things I’ve bought since quarantine started and my reviews:
Cameron Esposito’s book, Save Yourself, on audiobook. 10/10 would recommend. I’m about 60% of the way through already because I can’t stop listening.
ThirdLove, baby! They were having a sale so I finally bit the bullet. I am ashamed to admit how old all of my bras are (you can probably guess how old they are by the fact that they’re Victoria’s Secret PINK…) and I seriously needed to upgrade. I got the Classic T-Shirt Bra, which I cannot recommend highly enough, the Classic Uplift Plunge Bra, the Classic Strapless Bra, and the Seamless Lounge Bra (this was free with my purchase). The only one I’m not thrilled with is the strapless bra, because strapless bras are the work of the devil, but as strapless bras go, I trust it to get the job done.
This ban.do necklace. Over a year ago, when I got my initial (ultimately not completely accurate) psychiatric diagnosis, I bought this one, but I had to make an update. Eventually, I’ll complete the trifecta. This necklace is tiny and dainty and perfect for everyday wear.
I needed another slipper chair, because I moved our other one into the bedroom (it’s the sunniest room in our house, and, in between the plants, makes for a perfect reading nook!) I love the look of this chair, and I got it super on sale, but I will say that it’s lower-backed than I had hoped, and doesn’t quite fill the space it’s in.
This rug. I’m obsessed. It’s so soft, and it brings such a vibe to my bedroom. Great quality for the price.
This bag. So cute, and deceptively roomy! It’s deeply important to me that all of my purses can accommodate a reusable water bottle and a book.
I love these boots, so much. I’ve needed replacement booties for ages (I wore my Seychelles pair, similar to these, until they literally fell apart). I’ve been looking everywhere; the last place I expected to find them was Target. They’re super comfortable, go with everything, and I didn’t have to spend a fortune.
Betabrand Dress Pant Yoga Pants. I really wanted these to work out, since dress pants are a goddamn nightmare for me. My ankles, I think, are proportional to my hips/waist, and in dress pant world this is a no-no. Whoever designs dress pants thinks women are shaped like Humpty-Dumpty, it’s a travesty. All of which is a long way of saying that I returned them. I bought a medium, my normal size, and they were super loose in the waist. If I ever see a pair I like on sale (like, really on sale) I might try again in a small.
Lightswitch plates. Unfortunately, the ones I bought are no longer available, but they’re Hearth & Hand with Magnolia black metal. They look amazing and were soooo on sale.
Yet to Arrive/Use:
The nixit menstrual cup. I’m all about a waste-free period, so I’m up to try any innovation on that score. I’ve been using the Saalt cup and wash, which I’m perfectly happy with, but the nixit seems like it might be a little easier to insert/take out.
This pink nightstand! When I first moved into my house, over 6 years ago, I didn’t have a nightstand, so I picked something up at Marshall’s for about $30. It’s cute, but it really doesn’t go with our decor. This will be a perfect fit for our room!
I have long stanned Girlfriend Collective, and the Spring collection is no exception. I treated myself to the Paloma Bra & Leggings in “Wildflower.” I may have also gotten some scrunchies…the Unitard is on my wishlist but I have no idea why I’d ever need one. Fun fact—you get $15 off when you sign up for texts!
I shopped the Madewell sale for the first time in a while. But how could I have resisted these jeans? I’m probably going to live in this dress, and this one was too cute to pass up.
I mentioned this in a previous post, but I caved and bought these. But I will absolutely return them if the fit is not perfect! I swear!
More ThirdLove! They’re having a 2/$99 sale on their Pima Cotton Bras, so I snagged this one in Stormy Lilac and Ballet. I should mention: I’m donating all of my gently-used bras to I Support the Girls, which is an amazing organization that you should definitely check out! I also snagged the 7/$47 undies.
I’ve had my Kate Spade wallet for years and it’s one of the best investments I’ve made. It’s sturdy, functional, and adorable. Time to welcome another baby into the family…
Winc wine subscription. I am not about to go out right now for non-essentials, like wine, but it does suck being trapped day after day without a little something to sip on.
I think that’s it, although I wouldn’t be terribly shocked if a random package arrived in the next few weeks. Some of the items in the below section will inevitably be returned (please don’t think I’m made of money), and I’m definitely going to chill out now that quarantine life is becoming the new normal. I think, in times of stress or trauma, we can fall back on old patterns (for me, overspending), but we have to give ourselves some grace right now.
So, full disclosure—while I don’t identify as Christian (my dad’s fam is totally secular and my mother’s is lapsed Catholic AF), I L O V E Christmas. The opportunity to decorate my home with even more white and gold? Sign me up! I have two pre-lit trees—one I inherited from my mom (it’s green with colored lights) and one skinny 6′ rose gold tree that I got at Target before the 2016 election (that year was dark, so I decorated very early). I didn’t decorate last year because our house was under construction, so this year I went ham. But this is just a dry-run for next year, which will be over the freakin’ top. I’m already depressed about January coming and having to take down all my glitz. As long as it’s down by Valentine’s Day, I’m fine, right?
That said, here are some holiday faves!
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Best Ways to Give Back
Around the holidays I go beyond my usual small monthly donations! Here are some of my fave charities and ways to give!
My husband, the sweet angel of earth that he is, made me a curated playlist for Christmas called FIG for CHELS—Christmas Edition, because he is perfect. There are quite a number of songs on here I’d never heard before. “You’re a Gift” by The Both is my new favorite! And we can’t forget Holiday Soul Party!
I started compiling a Christmas album playlist for myself, but I got very, very lazy. Also, I work in a store that plays nonstop Christmas music (which I’m actually very here for) so I got my fill this year!
What’s your favorite Christmas song? Mine is “Father Christmas” by The Kinks!
Gift Cards to Amazon or Target—these will never not get used.
What I call “The Cornucopia”—hone in on one interest and make a gift basket out of tiny items! If your friend is a writer, buy them fancy versions of everything they need—a journal, pens, notepads, sticky notes, stickers, washi tape, paper clips, you name it! Most people (not me, obviously), but most people won’t indulge themselves in that gold stapler or adorable jar of wooden pushpins because function > fashion. Useful gifts are always the best gifts, and tons of little gifts, imo, are better than one. I did one of these for my husband for our first Christmas together and those items are still floating around the house.
A memory. This might sound dumb, but this is the perfect gift for the person who has everything. Example: I’m gifting my favorite professor a framed photo I took of the Bodleian Library at Oxford, because I first heard of it in his class and his support was the reason I got the opportunity to go there. I hope that, for years to come, he can glance over and think warmly about one of his favorite places.
And finally, a free idea, since not everyone in the world spends money like a millionaire (guilty!)—a hand-written card or letter. Literally who writes letters anymore?! I’ve done this a couple of times for various events (sometimes accompanying a gift, sometimes not), and it always gets a great response. Not everyone needs external validation all the time (guilty!) but people love knowing how special they are to you!
I am about to seriously out myself right now, but I’ve never seen Die HardorHome Alone. I know. I suck. Truth be told, I’ve never actually even watched A Christmas Story from start to finish. I am not a movie girl (I blame the ADHD). I’m a TV addict—hit me with a Doctor Who or Downton Christmas special any day.
My personal favorite holiday films: It’s A Wonderful Life (true life: I was in a stage production of this when I was 16), the Mickey Mouse & Muppet versions of A Christmas Carol, the Jim Carrey Grinch, and of course, ELF, the best Christmas movie of all time.
You probably only have a week off, so these are some shows you can absolutely finish before the new year! Snuggle up with your cats and watch these masterpieces!
So, Hanukkah has been over for a minute, but it doesn’t mean I didn’t attempt to observe. I was too lazy to make actual latkes, but I did a run of potato soups as an homage to the culinary concept.
I didn’t buy a menorah because I kept thinking that cashiers would judge me for adding one to a cart full of sparkly Christmas garlands, but I have my eye on a few for next year—this one, this mod one, this gorgeous gold one, and this colorful one.
And good on SJ to give us a Hanukkah song that’s way better than Adam Sandler’s.
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I hope anything on this list is helpful to your holiday season!
P.S. Michael’s Christmas stuff is all 50%-60% off right now, so get thee gone.
P.P.S Send me #thoughtsandprayers that it doesn’t snow anytime soon.
I know what you’re thinking—did she die?? I mean, kind of. I got back from Europe and immediately started a full-time management position working for a huge corporation. It’s not as glamorous as it sounds, and I won’t name-check it, but trust me, you know this place and you probably love it. So my limited free time has consisted mostly of sleep, meditation, and NY Times crossword puzzles.
Casually met Stacy King aka Sucré at Great Scott the night before my birthday. NO BIG DEAL, SHE’S ONLY MY IDOL. Get her newest single, In Pieces, and while you’re at it, buy “Inside,” Loner,Absentee, and A Minor Birdtoo.
I started using a tongue scraper and honestly, it’s the best thing that’s happened to me in my adult life. I use this model (it came in the Oui Fresh July Beauty Box!). I recommend copper because it’s a bacteria-resistant metal—and aside from that, it’s cute as hell! My mouth feels so much cleaner and the mouth is the first stop for overall health, so it makes sense to take good care of it, right?
Just bought a Girlfriend set of this bra and these leggings, because being the cutest girl at the gym is extremely important to me. Next pay cycle I’ll be grabbing the same in Jade (hopefully the Paloma bra will be back in stock!) I currently have this set: bra (in powder blue)/ leggings. I’ve also been rocking this ban.doyoga mat, which people at yoga class think is a riot! Although I will say that in terms of functionality, my lulu mat is far superior.
Younger‘s Season 5 is done, so binge that shit! Catch up on Hulu.
I just read Guy Branum’s My Life as a Goddess(available wherever books are sold), and it was incredible. I couldn’t put it down. It’s smart, hilarious, and moving. I’ll probably break down and buy the audiobook for my eventual re-read—hearing Guy perform it sounds like such a dream. Watch him slay on Conan.
I am currently reading Crazy Rich Asiansby Kevin Kwan. I’m really enjoying it so far, and I can’t wait to see how they’ve interpreted it for the film!
I’m listening to Kate Nash’s Yesterday Was Foreverwhile writing this post and I’m loving it! Stream it via this link, but also, y’know, purchase it to support our girl!
the gates at kensington palace
Lykke Li put out an album this year?? I had no clue, but as soon as I found out, I listened to it obsessively. so sad so sexyis just full of bops!
Today is release day for Erin Gibson’s Feminasty! If you don’t know Erin, she’s the co-host of the incomparable Throwing Shade podcast with Bryan Safi. I pre-ordered this puppy on Audible—it was a tough choice between the book and audio but since I’m used to listening to Erin & Bryan every week on the pod, audio won out!
Sherri & Max Bemis launched a Kickstarter! This comes on the heels of Max announcing that Say Anything is no more—some exciting changes are in the works! Pledge to support their dreams and help them keep creating art! Bonus Lucy & Coraline content, too.
JK was sponsored by FabFitFun on I Seem Funso I finally caved and got a box. I’ll report back once I receive it—I’m excited! I love a subscription box because I am the bougiest.
Just discovered Mitski and I’m so mad none of you told me about her.
Alone Together is one of the best written shows on television right now. I’ve watched the entire series twice—I watched it and then immediately forced my husband to watch it (he loves it).
Have I talked about American Vandal on here yet? I’m way late to the game but American Vandal is a perfect, perfect show. I’m obsessed. Who drew the dicks??
I started a Depop shop. I’ve tried (and been successful with) Poshmark in the past, but I’m trying something new! Buy my designer stuff! I’ll probably upload these items to Posh as well (I’m open to offers!)
I discovered Fopp while I was in England. If you live in the UK you must go there. I bought 6 books for £3!
I’m sure it’s basic as hell, and I’m a wine peasant, but this Dry Riseling never disappoints. Pro-tip: always make sure to buy dry Riselings, not off-dry (demi-sec), otherwise you’ll basically be drinking sugar-water.
Marmite is GREAT and we need to start using it in the US!
The Lindbergh Candle Co. shop is open for pre-orders! This is my favorite candle company (their reed diffusers are incredible—I have one in my bathroom and I get so many compliments!) I love supporting small businesses (this one’s out of Atlanta, one of my favorite places).
wadham college at oxford
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Okay. I’m exhausted. That was a lot. I hope some of this tickles your fancy! I’ll just be in my office, diffusing some Stress Away, and enjoying one of my very rare days off.
They were the first things I ever bought and owned with my own money. My parents read to us religiously as children, and always supported our desires to go to the bookstore or the library (Walpole, MA Barnes & Noble and Morrill Memorial Library, wassup?) Because I didn’t really get into clothes & fashion until my late teens/early 20s, the books I owned and treasured were my outward manifestations of self. They represented who I was—a reader. A reader of classics, YA, total trash, anything I could get my hands on.
I even brought a shitload of my books to college. I remember the flimsy shelves above my dorm’s Twin XL bowing under the weight of my volumes. Moving has always been a nightmare—most of the boxes are just tomes on tomes. My poor husband had to take about three trips with the car just to get each and every books and massive Tupperware container of David Sedaris, Chuck Klosterman, Kurt Vonnegut.
At a certain point, though, I had to grow up. I’m an adult woman with a home—I’ve got to be organized! I took to downsizing my collection, which I thought would be completely heartbreaking, but was much easier than I thought! Here’s what I did!
I loved this book. So, so much. I devoured it in only a couple of days after picking it up at a thrift store. But it’s no longer on my shelf (I donated it to my local library). The reason being that I likely won’t reread it and the desire for someone else to enjoy it outweighs my desire to keep it. I used to be a serial re-reader (how more of my books didn’t come apart at the binding, I’ll never know), but now that I am an adult with the resources to interact with ALL OF LITERATURE via the internet, ain’t nobody got time for that! I keep books that I know I’ll make reference to or return to time and time again (The Bell Jaris my best example of this). If you love something, set it free!
2. Does this represent the person that I am, or the person that I was?
I’m 100% here for remembering where you came from, but it’s not always flattering or as idyllic as you remember. When I was in high school, I read every damn thing Chuck Palahniuk ever wrote. It was dirty, subversive, thrillingly perverse. As a young, inexperienced person, I couldn’t get enough! But I’m older now, and (I hope) a little smarter and more worldly. I appreciate the role these books played in my maturation, but I likely won’t read them again and I can see that some of the material within them is a bit…problematic. But you didn’t click this to hear a feminist lecture.
P.S. If someone gifts me Adjustment Day, I won’t not read it.
My dad gave this book to me (I used to really enjoy Real Time before I became fatigued of certain…let’s just say, problems), and at the time, I really did plan to read it. However, other books took priority (lots of comedic memoirs by women), and I never got around to it. By the time I decided to donate a bunch of books, it was easy to part with, since it held no real meaning to me. Also, Bill Maher’s honestly kind of a dick. Conversely, Yaa Gyasi’s Homegoing is a book on my shelf that I haven’t read yet, but the prospect of finally diving into it thrills me!
4. Am I just keeping this to seem smart?
Example: Gustave Flaubert’s Complete Works
I used to work at Barnes & Noble. Yes, the very same one I went to constantly as a child (I’m predictable). The employee discount is sweet, so during my tenure I bought a lot of books. After reading Madame Bovary at 17 and absolutely loving it, I had a fancy that I might want to read all of Flaubert’s writing, so I bought an enormous tome of it. I lugged that massive thing from home to home to college to apartment and so on. I don’t think I ever opened it. Meanwhile, I had physical copies of just Madame Bovary in English and French! At a certain point, I had to let it go, and to the library it went. I still plan on reading more Flaubert (ten years later, smh), but I’ll have to buy individual copies, or go digital ($0.99 on Kindle!)
More Tips
Spark Joy. Marie Kondo knows WTF she’s talking about. Pick up each and every book you own and see if it sparks any feeling. When I picked up some classics that I should have felt inspired by, I felt nothing. (Hint: I got rid of a lot of books by male authors this way!) Using this method, I donated 2 full milk crates of books to my local library.
Go digital! Over last summer, I finally read The Handmaid’s Tale. I borrowed a physical copy from my campus library, but I wanted to have a copy for reference. Luckily, at least at the time, the Kindle edition was available fo’ free on Amazon (it’s now available for free via Kindle Unlimited). P.S. Claire Danes narrates the audiobook! This was a great way to keep something that I felt sentimentally attached to, without spending money or adding clutter to my home!
On that note, get on the audiobook train! This is another way to reduce clutter but still devour books! I recently “read” Everything is Awful by Matt Bellassai, I’m Fine by Whitney Cummings, and The Princess Diaristby Carrie Fisher, all narrated by their respective authors, and it was such an awesome experience
And of course, last but certainly not least, give your library some love! Libraries are so important, and they need our support. They are a vital part of the community, and a great way to keep engaging with Literature without joining the cast of Hoarders. Look for opportunities to volunteer or donate (money or books). Help out with a Friends of the Library book sale! It’s so easy to just buy everything on Amazon (literally all of the links in this post are Amazon, sorry), so don’t forget that your local or campus library is a great resource.
What are some other tips to help me kick out clutter?
This week was Valentine’s Day, and although I am the world’s least romantic person, I got to have Thai food and watch Freaks and Geeks with the bae after a long day’s work—V-Day success! Plus, this is a long weekend, so I am RELISHING the break. Here are a bunch of things that brightened my week (which felt really, really, really long, didn’t it?)
It’s Valentine’s Week, as Logan Huntzberger might say, so the number one thing I love this week is Bae. The only cute bae nickname I can think of that hasn’t already been taken is “The Bae Harbor Butcher,” but that’s a pretty deep cut Dexter reference that no one would understand. Happy belated Valentimes to my hubby.
Have I really never linked to the incredible Etta James song that is the inspiration for this series? Shame on me.
I’m excited to start watching this show. According to Julie Klausner, who blessed us with an episode of How Was Your Week for Valentine’s Day, it’s beautifully moving.
I just got this audiobook and I am so, so, so excited to listen! Lindy is the G.O.A.T.
Bae and I will probably go see Black Panther this weekend—I’m so excited! I’m not a superhero person at all (I basically just likeJessica Jones), but it apparently lives up to the hype! Now if I could only get around to watching Wonder Woman…
I’m admittedly a late-adopter to GoodReads. I honestly didn’t even know it existed until this winter. As a lover of reading but an easily-distracted user of social media, I don’t read nearly as much as I used to, and frankly, that needs to change. A lot of the reading I’m on the hook for is dense criticism, but that’s no reason that my free time can’t be spent indulging in literature instead of binge-watching The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel again. For the past few years I’ve challenged myself to a somewhat vague 2 books/month reading challenge. But now that I’ve embraced audiobooks, there’s no reason that I can’t dramatically increase that number! I’m nothing if not incredibly competitive, so bring it on!
I just changed my 2018 GoodReads from 30 books to 40 books this year, and I’ve already almost completed my seventh! 40 books a year is (very roughly) a book a week (0.7), so I’m going to have to set some serious goals and maybe even schedule my reading time!
Here’s some of the stuff (that I already own) on my list for 2018!
The Princess Diarist, Carrie Fisher (audiobook)
Hope Leslie, Catherine Maria Sedgwick
Between the World and Me, Ta-Nehisi Coates
Uncle Tom’s Cabin, Harriet Beecher Stowe
The Bondwoman’s Narrative, Hannah Crafts
Our Nig, Harriet E. Wilson
The Lamplighter, Maria Susanna Cummins
Ruth Hall, Fanny Fern
Homegoing, Yaa Gyasi
Uncommon Type, Tom Hanks
The Argonauts, Maggie Nelson
The Wild, Wild World, Susan Warner
Breakfast at Tiffany’s, Truman Capote (I’ve read this, but the audiobook is narrated by Michael C. Hall, who I have an unstoppable crush on)
Hard Choices & What Happened, Hillary Rodham Clinton
What else should I add?
xoxo,
c
P.S. One of these days, I’m going to give in to my baser instincts and sign off my blog post “xoxo, gossip girl.”
Happy Sunday, everyone! I hope you all slept in and cozied up with a mug of coffee. I’m spending the day reading and visiting with family, but before I do that, I wanted to share a couple of things I love from across the vast Internet. This week has a fitness theme, since I went to the gym twice yesterday and am now basically immortal.
I started doing yoga every Saturday morning at my local gym and it has been an exhilarating change of pace! I find myself looking forward to it all week. I’ve been an on-again off-again yogi for about ten years, so I’ve got some pretty sweet gear—like I’ve said on the blog before, beautiful things inspire me! My lululemon yoga bag (similar), lime green mat & matching towel, and block accompany me to every session (thanks for the presents, mom!). lulu’s stuff is great, but every piece is a million dollars, so I’ll be over here, perusing their sale section.
Over the holidays, Girlfriend Collective had a free bra promotion when you bought a pair of leggings! So, of course, I bought myself a set of these leggings and this adorable bra. I had first heard of Girlfriend a few years ago when they were first starting out—they had a deal where you could get a free pair of leggings for only the cost of shipping! They quickly became one of my favorite brands, with their focus on sustainability and humane labor practices.
This Rebecca Minkoff duffle was inexplicably inexpensive on Amazon, so I had to snag it. Of course I have a designer gym bag—I’m the bougie-est person on the planet. If I could retroactively gather the money I’ve spent on handbags in the past five years, I could easily pay for grad school. Some other gym bags I was peepin’ are this one, this one, and this one.
On that note, I’ve been tracking my water intake like a psycho lately. I’ve always been really good about #stayinghydrated, but nothing keeps me more in check than my reusable water bottles. I usually rock a 32oz Camelbak, but please get me one of these in every single color available. If I’m being honest, I’ll probably cave and buy this one today. I’ve heard great things about S’well bottles, but I cannot bring myself to shell out $30+ for a vessel to hold (free) water. Even if it’s this pretty. Maybe I’ll do it in honor of the Women’s March (S’well is a badass woman-owned company!) P.S. Even though I’m not drinking right now, the 25oz. S’well can hold a bottle of wine…food for thought!
I just started listening to Whitney Cummings’ book, I’m Fine…and Other Lies, on Audible, and I am loving it so far! It’s hilarious (no surprises there), but also oddly inspiring. Whitney talks at length about her many forays into therapy, which tugs at my heartstrings like Joanna Newsom on a harp. Next time I have to go to the gym without my husband (the horror), I’ll be glad to have Whitney as an elliptical companion.
I got into sneakers (and by got into sneakers, I mean, condescended to own them) a few years ago, but now that I actually have an excuse to wear them, I might have to step my game up beyond my clearance Nikes. These are gorgeous, I am positively lusting over these, and these must enter my life immediately.
Enjoy the rest of your day off, and buckle up for the work week!
2017 is over and frankly, BYE GIRL. What a rough year. I went from severe election depression, to a Mexican vacation, to not knowing WTF I was doing with my life, to going to grad school. The transition was rough, but not just for me. This year has also, obviously, been an actual trash-fire for the entire country.
But apart from praying for mercy from our overlords, there were a few enjoyable things about 2017. I went to Cancún and Atlanta for the first time, and got to spend two weeks in L.A., which I proudly yet undeservedly consider my homeland. I dove even deeper into my comedy obsession, and turned it into a final paper on feminism and comedy writing (in which I got to use the quotation “Men are a cancer! God made a mistake!“). I binged so much TV that it should be considered a crime against (my own) humanity. I started therapy and got back on meds. Actually, if it weren’t for the backdrop of constant nuclear panic, 2017 might have even been a good year.
Luckily, even in the darkest timeline, artists gonna art, so there was a barrage of dope shit released this year. Here are the things that really stood out in my 2017:
Literally everything Roxane Gay has ever written is perfect, so it was a no-brainer that this incredible book would be on my “Best Of” list. This book is so powerful and emotional; I cried reading it. Hunger is, genuinely, a memoir of her body—unlike so many other books written in a similar vein, this one has no self-help aims or “happy ending.” It is a raw, honest rendering of past and present traumas, and though Ms. Gay’s journey is unique to her, her writing speaks to the universal truths familiar to all those who inhabit bodies and navigate the world. For six months, the words of Hunger have stayed with me, like a haunting presence.
I haven’t finished this book yet, so no spoilers! (lol)
Part of me loves this book so much merely because I love Secretary Clinton and want to push back against the haters that think, for some reason, that it’s unacceptable that the first female presidential candidate of a major political party should write a book chronicling her experiences. I know this about myself. What I didn’t expect, upon beginning to listen (I’m checking out Audible this season), is how deeply First Lady Clinton’s words would affect me. She gets pretty real about her journey, and doesn’t shy away from being honest about the present danger in which America finds itself. But it’s never sad. In What Happened, hope eclipses sadness and darkness at every turn. It doesn’t hurt that Senator Clinton is funny as hell, either. Listening to What Happened is like inspiring meditation for all of us who were deeply hurt last November.
So, if Popular Vote Winner Rodham Clinton wants to hit me up for a glass of Chardonnay, just DM me @highwaytochel, bby.
Just realized I keep switching up her name! I guess she just has so many accomplishments that I’m not even sure what to call her!
This list was getting pretty heavy, so I had to turn up the levity to 11.
Matt Bellassai is a national treasure. I first heard of him on Throwing Shade, so I’m a bit of a late adopter, but as soon as I heard him on TSPod, I sought out his podcast Unhappy Hour, which led me to his book, which I scored, again, on Audible. I knew the book would be funny, but I didn’t think it would be laugh-out-loud-like-a-maniac-alone-in-my-car funny. The writing is so, so good. He has such a clear, distinct voice that it’s shocking he’s only my age. It’s so powerful, in fact, that I find myself relating on a deep level to a chubby, sheltered, Midwestern, gay, cis-male child, most of whose adjectives don’t describe me at all! I rarely advocate for audiobook over real book, but hearing Bellassai’s delivery is the icing on the cake.
Check out his popular Whine About It videos on Buzzfeed!
Amy Sherman-Palladino has blessed us once again! The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (which Jen Kirkman consulted on, nbd) is my favorite new show of the year! I’m not even that bitter about the fact that the lead actress, Rachel Brosnahan, is the same age as me!
The MMM tells the story of Midge, a 26-year-old mother of two in 1958, going through a separation following her husband, Joel’s, infidelity. Joel had been fervently pursuing a stand-up career (i.e. plagiarizing one), but it turns out that his wife is the real natural. Coached by Susie, played by the incomparable Alex Borstein, Midge begins to perform, to varying degrees of success. Oh, and Lenny Bruce is a character.
In true ASP fashion, the dialogue is fast-paced, joke dense, and sensational. If there had to be an heir to Gilmore Girls, this is indeed the one. I just watched the series but might start it over and force the huz to watch it with me. 10/10
Is Get Out the best movie I’ve ever seen? Strong possibility. Give Jordan Peele and Daniel Kaluuya and Betty Gabriel all of the Oscars!
I knew it was going to be good, but I didn’t know it would be that good. I only just watched Get Out this fall, since I am horror-averse to the extreme, but I already know it will be one of my life-long favorites. Unfortunately, to write pretty much anything about it would spoil the majesty, and for once, I don’t want to spoil it for anyone. I was shocked, despite waiting months to watch it, and I wouldn’t take that experience away from anyone.
Jordan Peele is a genius. The film is aesthetically gorgeous, socially aware, hilarious, and terrifying. It’s a horror film, and a comedy, and a documentary.
P.S. I had the unique privilege of writing one of my final papers about Get Out, which I’m submitting to conferences!
If you didn’t like this movie, please eject yourself from planet Earth. I won’t spoil it for anyone (it was spoiled for me by my brother), but it was a joy and a pleasure. I gasped in surprise or glee multiple times, and I got to experience the entire thing sitting between my husband and my best friend—best combo ever. I’d write more about how much it rocked my world, but I’m busy going to see it again.
I finally discovered the true, unadulterated joy that is Hallmark Christmas movies. I watched Christmas in the Air*, which only made me thirst for more**. These things are a bright spot in an increasingly dismal world. Plus, where else will you experience the true joy of a 49-year-old, childless female lead? Hallmark doesn’t even know that it’s feminist!
*I will say, specific to this film, that it espoused one trash value, which is that messiness and imperfection is acceptable. You should have let her clean your office, dude. You’re not a creative genius—you have untreated ADHD.
**There’s an upcoming one starring Candace Cameron Bure and Marilu Henner!
I. Love. St. Vincent. I finally got to see her in concert last month at the House of Blues! I’ve liked her for years, but I have to admit, when she started getting super high concept, starting with Strange Mercy and continuing even stronger with St. Vincent, I really became a superfan. Masseduction doesn’t disappoint for a second—it’s got killer visuals, tight tunes, and her sexiest sound yet. Go purchase this album with human currency!
As if The National could put out a bad album. I’ve been waiting for what seems like decades for new Ntl jams, and finally, my prayers have been answered. Sleep Well Beast is everything I dreamed it would be and more. It has more tech-y, electronic-y moments (please, don’t be intimidated by my vast knowledge of music) than previous releases, but it works. Get on this album, my dudes.
I know. I’m going back on years of hating on T. Swift. I can admit I was wrong! In my hour of darkness she was standing right in front of me, speaking words of wisdom, so let her be.
Reputation is bops for days. I adore it. I’ve listened to it more than the previous 2 albums combined, which severely deducts cool points from my street cred. But I don’t care. I even like “Look What You Made Me Do” which was pretty much universally panned. Highlights are, for sure, “Endgame (feat. Future & Ed Sheeran),” “Ready For It,” and “I Did Something Bad,” but basically every song is great so just go listen to it? T. Swift redeemed.
Guys, I got to actually go to PYHT in Hollywood! It was probably the craziest night of my entire life—maybe I’ll share the story someday—but it was an amazing experience I wouldn’t trade for anything. The whole drama is recorded on the podcast, so if you’re a listener, you may know what I’m referring to. It was definitely a…teachable moment.
Cam & Rhea, thanks for being the moms we all need, and being genuinely the warmest and best people I’ve ever met.
My ABM ladies started a natural beauty line! Lipstick, lip gloss, and essential oils, oh my! I am obsessed with clean beauty products (#backonmyhippiebullshit), so these gems were a total godsend. I took advantage of all of the launch and holiday sales, so I, of course, have the full lip collection. They go on smooth, hydrate, last, and bonus: the lip gloss smells like yummy vanilla!
The lipsticks and lip glosses all have ’90s namesakes like Blossom, Kapowski, Pink Ranger, and As If! They even have a natural beauty subscription box, à la Birchbox, which flies off the virtual shelves every month. I subscribed in December, and got an amazing box of goodies! 10/10 would recommend!
Della Bites 