The Best Things I’ve Spent Money on This Year

Okay, so by this year, I mean 1/1/19 to present. As I may have previously mentioned, I took a really prolonged break from spending money so that I could (successfully!) pay off ALL of my credit card debt. I also refinanced my student loans and got a lower interest rate on my car loan, so despite the fact that I absolutely was not making a living wage, I managed to kick some serious financial ass. I would not have been able to do any of this without my amazing husband and my in-laws—they’re so supportive and generous.

The crazy thing is, I went through and tallied up what I spent on everything on this list, and it’s roughly equivalent to what I spent on copays and medication for the year. Not trying to be controversh, but I shouldn’t be able to get an enormous tattoo, furniture, and an iPhone for less money than basic healthcare. In the spirit of that sentiment, please join DSA and consider volunteering for the Bernie Sanders campaign /end rant.

It’s also worth mentioning that a couple of the things mentioned below are from truly evil corporations that I, as a feminist socialist, do not want to continue supporting. Disengaging with major retailers is hard work, and participating in capitalism at all means that we all have the “damn’d spot*” on our hands. Next year, I hope this list is all small businesses and sustainable retailers, but all I can do is try my best. So without further ado, here are the purchases I made last year that were absolutely worth every penny:

iPhone 11

Owning this device has kind of ruined my life, to be honest. I was already pretty addicted to my phone, but the size of this screen and sleekness of the device have me hooked. The best feature, by far, is the fact that I can more easily do the New York Times crossword on this screen, which is truly the only thing I care about in this life. And I have to admit, I love the facial recognition. I know Apple is probably conspiring with the government and stealing my identity or whatever, but the level of convenience of opening things with Face ID is…almost worth it? Saying this really feels like the Chrissy Teigen tweet about Airpods, don’t cancel me.

Casetify Phone Case

This thing is indestructible, and comes in about a billion designs. I, of course, went with the sunflower pattern. I got a discount code from a podcast for 20% off, but I’d absolutely pay full price for another one.

AirPods

I finally did it. I caved and bought AirPods. I was going to buy them through Apple, but I found the same ones on Amazon for considerably cheaper (I bought this silicone protective case too). I…love them. I can’t believe I didn’t buy them sooner.

Magnetic Car Mount

A lot of phone shit, I know. but I’ve tried every type of car mount on the market, and this is by a mile the best. The magnet is super strong, and you can just stick it inside your case so you don’t have a big ugly sticker on the back. The best part is, for only $6, it’s a 2-pack, so you can give one to your significant other. My husband is still rocking an iPhone 6+, but the gear’s ready for him whenever he decides to upgrade.

The Comfiest Cardigan

Target has really been coming thruuuu with cute clothes and décor lately. This cardigan, from their A New Day line, is legitimately the coziest garment I own. I love it so much, I went back for another one.

The Best Earrings in the Game

Okay, so I’m wildly biased, because creator and entrepreneur Shelly Harper is my cousin, but damned if I don’t love her work. She is a fucking artist. Harp Designs is a woman-owned, woman-made brand out of Oakland, CA, and it makes the jewelry at retailers like Madewell look like an absolute lil’ bitch. Everything she makes is outstanding, but these earrings are so fun that I had to have them in gold and silver.

A Kitchen Table

The pub table in my kitchen had been rickety for a while, but for the ~$100 I paid for it, it certainly served its purpose. Helping my mother shop for her new home, I stumbled across this beauty, basically a dupe of my old table, except cuter, and I simply had to have it. It could be a little sturdier, but to its credit, I built it, so…

Savage Lovecast Magnum Edition

IT’S VERY IMPORTANT TO ME, OKAY! I’m done with podcast ads, they’ve been my undoing! This podcast is my must-listen of my week, and I respect Dan so much for evolving and growing and doing everything in his power to get progressive ideas into the mainstream dialogue. Nobody’s perfect, but I’ve never not enjoyed an episode of this show. I also subscribed to Slate Plus for Dear Prudence and Stitcher Premium for Groceries, and I have zero regrets (except for the fact that Stitcher is quite possibly the ugliest, least user-friendly app on the planet). The Stitcher subscription won’t last, but ad-free podcasts were absolutely the highlight of 2019 for me.

Netflix & Hulu (no commercials!) Subscriptions

To be fair, I’ve had these for a lot longer than a year, but when you’re trying to live that homebody life and save money, these services are indispensable! We got rid of cable about a year ago, so this is the only way I can keep up with my programmes. For the combined total of $20.98/month, I get more TV than I could ever find the time to consume. Beautiful.

Monthly Charitable Donations

I’ve been donating $5/month to the ACLU & Planned Parenthood since the day after the 2016 election. It’s not much, but the number of donors to these organizations is often as important a metric as the amount donated. Planned Parenthood is an organization which is particularly near and dear to my heart, and from whose services I have personally benefitted. I also give to WERS, which is the local radio station out of Emerson College, because independent radio is important, and for my money, it’s the only radio station in the Greater Boston Area that plays anything I’d ever want to listen to.

A Tattoo

Hell yeah. So, here’s the story from A to Z—when I was 21, and towards the end of my last pre-husband relationship, I impulsively got a matching tattoo of (gag) Minnie Mouse on my ribs with my ex-boyfriend. That was in July…we broke up in November. So, for nearly 7 years, I’ve been living with this incredibly stupid-looking reminder of the guy I started dating when I was 18. No shade to him—I truly hope he’s living his best life, he’s a great guy—but it also seems psycho to have this permanently etched on my body. So, I put out some feelers on Facebook (I know…) and my friend Lauren hipped me to her shop. After perusing the various portfolios of the recommended shops, Famous Tattoos in Dartmouth won out. It’s clean, not too far away, and the work speaks for itself. Cut to a few months later—it was the best body art experience of my life. Ryan Vidinha is incredibly talented and so skillful with the tattoo needles. I sat for a cumulative 6 hours between two sessions, and he made it an absolute pleasure. And SO REASONABLY PRICED for what he was able to accomplish. My shop 4 life. Having a beautiful piece of art in place of what used to be an embarrassing blemish is so freeing. Best money I’ve ever spent.

Oh, and I got another tattoo, whilst I was on vacation in Florida. Gaze upon it. Apparently I wore the exact same outfit to both.

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Laser Tattoo Removal

I know, I just got an enormous cover-up tattoo. Why wouldn’t I just do the same in this case? Look, I tried. Because of the placement of my wrist tattoo, and how heavily the line-work was done, it’d be nearly impossible to do a cover-up that wasn’t giant and blobby to cover the black. Luckily, I discovered Disappearing Inc. Utter pros. Tattoo removal is a long, expensive process, and I’m so lucky to have Jenna as my technician. The tattoo is 3 stars (from the corner of the pages of Harry Potter, I truly was an absolute dumb bitch as a youth) and they’re so poorly done. They never healed correctly. I’ve cringed looking at them for years, and I’m so excited to see them slowly fade away. Read up on how tattoo removal works—it’s nuts and fascinating!

So it’s been a wrap-wrap-wrap up, a 12-month wrap-up. Thanks for tuning in!

*You know a bitch got out her 1973 edition of the Riverside Shakespeare to make sure she typed that correctly. Act V, scene i of MacBeth, my fave play 4 life.

Shout Out Sunday 2.9.20

Good day, sunshines! I truly think I’d post these more regularly if it weren’t for the pressure of choosing a photo. This week—I don’t even care. Let’s get to it, shall we?

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nothing but respect for my president
  1. I absolutely need this poster. And if you want to get me the accompanying t-shirt, I won’t be mad. And, I cannot tell a lie, I bought the tote.
  2. My skin, especially my hands, have been dry af this winter, so I’ve been using this nonstop.
  3. I know it’s only February, but this has to be the best album of the year, right?
  4. Michael and I started watching Curb Your Enthusiasm again and, it’s truly the greatest show ever made.
  5. We also just watched the newest season of The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel and it’s an absolute fever dream. I think I’ll watch it again before I form a solid critical opinion. I’m also listening to the Maisel Goys, of course.
  6. Can’t wait to watch Alison Brie’s new movie, Horse Girl.
  7. I also really want to watch the Taylor Swift documentary.
  8. I joined DSA on New Year’s Day. Link up!
  9. This song slaps, and was used quite beautifully in Sex Education, a show I cannot help but stan in all of these lists every week.
  10. This is the greatest thing I’ve ever seen in my life.

Peace to all freaks! Until next week,

c

Shout Out Sunday 9.1.19

I’ve been the worst at putting these up lately, so this week’s is going to be AWESOME. JAM-PACKED with goodies. Without further ado, let’s get into it!

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cue mitski’s “me and my husband”
  1. Lana Del Rey’s new album is out and it’s called Norman Fucking Rockwell!!! I can’t even handle that. I’ve been on the Lana Del Train since the very beginning so I’m sure this will be on repeat aaaallll week. P.S. She covered Sublime’s “Doin’ Time.”
  2. Sucré put out a new video for “Truth or Dare” !!!!!
  3. Have you ever heard of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria? My therapist told me about it earlier this week, and it was like a punch in the gut how much it spoke to me and what I’ve been going through these godforsaken 28 years.
  4. I have these in gold and I just ordered them in silver because they are the greatest earrings ever made. Try the code SUMMERBLUES for 20% off (not sure how long it’s good for so go go go!)
  5. I’m reading Meg Wolitzer’s The Female Persuasion (on my Kindle via Libby, obvi) and really enjoying it thus far! Don’t trust anyone who says you can’t judge a book by its super-cool looking cover.
  6. Have you been listening to Throwing Shade Presents: GROCERIES?! That’s right! A podcast about grocery stores! It’s on Stitcher Premium and they’re having a subscription sale with the code LABORDAY right now, so you know what to do.
  7. I read Little Fires Everywhere and loved it, so as the Celeste Ng completist I am, I’m reading Everything I Never Told You next.
  8. Justin Baldoni did a TED talk about redefining masculinity and it’s incredible.
  9. Did I mention that I’m trying out these reusable makeup-remover pads? The ones I got are sold out but the adorable grapefruit ones are still available. My goal is to use these for makeup removal only, and to snag some reusable rounds for toner/micellar water.
  10. I’m trying to be a little bit better about doing laundry…it’s my least favorite chore. But especially as I’m transitioning towards more sustainable clothing purchases (hello, Everlane!), I want my things to last me years. Jolie Kerr, of Ask A Clean Person fame, recommends mesh laundry bags—who am I to question an expert?
  11. Also, I bought these. Please don’t judge me.

 

Shout Out Sunday 4.21.19

Good morning! This week was truly tough for me. It almost ended in hospitalization (what a great way to miss family Easter that would have been). Oh yeah, it’s Easter, so enjoy that if Christianity is something you do. I’ll just be buying discount candy tomorrow.

Here’s some dope shit from the week!

  1. QUEEN JESUS LIZZO’S NEW ALBUM IS OUT! Stream Cuz I Love You, or buy it with human money, you nerd.
  2. Can’t get enough of “Hard Case” by Tedeschi Trucks Band.
  3. Donald Glover made a movie with Rihanna???
  4. All of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend is now on Netflix, so I know what you’re doing with your weekend! I just finished the series and will probably binge the whole thing from the beginning.
  5. Fell in love with Pixi by Petra Mattelast Liquid Lip. Actually, Pixi in general.
  6. Sansa Stark really is that bitch.
  7. Donate to Elizabeth Warren’s campaign. Sure, there are a few great options for 2020 but Warren has been out here in these streets putting out progressive policy and being an unequivocal badass every damn day. A donation to her is a small way of saying that policy matters. Lol, remember how, 4 years ago, every bro said that they’d totally vote for a progressive like Warren, just not Hillary? They lied (duh) and it’s gonna be a long fight.
  8. Brandy Jensen is therapy.
  9. I’m just here for the Cardi.
  10. I finally pulled the trigger on subscribing to Dear Prudence on Slate Plus and the Magnum edition of the Savage Lovecast. It’s called self-care.
  11. I’m dumb and didn’t realize that my favorite tattoo/piercing place opened up a Boston location…years ago. Can’t wait to get more work done!
  12. How to Break Your Single-Use Plastic Habit.
  13. If you’ve been reading for a while, you know I go back and forth about alcohol, but this is a fun little list if you want to impress at your next dinner party.
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notre dame, 19 july 2018

And last but certainly not least, I was heartbroken to learn about the Notre Dame fire this week. I was so fortunate to be able to see it last summer, even if I didn’t get to spend nearly as much time admiring it as I may have liked. It’s breathtaking, living history, and I’m so glad to know that much of the art, artifacts, and relics were saved.

 

Snowpocalypse 2018: A Reflection

Climate change is real, y’all.

Just gaze at this charming description of my region:

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It’s another Nor’Easter! My in-laws lost power but thankfully our old house (built in 1900) is somehow a bulwark never failing against storms (we nevah evah lose powah, kid). This week’s avalanche of death is being referred to as “Winter Storm Quinn,” which, honestly, for the 90s babies among us, is just kind of a bitchy move.

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Because I am quite literally snowed in, here’s how I’ll be entertaining myself today:

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fucking illegal this man should be. i’m going to have a stroke. i keep editing this caption because i have a palpitation every time i look down at this pic. see that chain? it’s dogtags. didn’t even know i had an army thing! but i guess, now that you mention it, milo as a vietnam vet in this is us
  • Catching up on The Resident. You have got to get into this show. Matt Czuchry is so hot in it that it should be a federal crime. He’s one of those Paul Rudd bastards that only gets hotter with age. It’s a travesty. He’s bringing Logan Huntzberger charm & daddy issues to the role, except, instead of a yuppie, he’s a fucking doctor who fought in Afghanistan and has tattoos. I rest my case. Also, apart from this insane digression about how much of a borderline unacceptable crush I have on the lead actor, the show is actually very good. Shaunette Renée Wilson from Black Panther is in the main cast, and she is a revelation.
  • Bingeing The Good Wife on Hulu because Czuchry is also in that, and I have no dignity or shame. Doctor Logan, Lawyer Logan.
  • HOW WAS YOUR WEEK IS BACK. This is not a drill. Jubees, Jimmy Jazz, and Ryan “Hot Lips” Houlihan are serving up the goods on a weekly basis. RIP Difficult People but Hallelujah to the return of the pod (sung like Mark Morrison).
  • Dis bitch be shoppin’. I can’t help but mindlessly window-shop to get the endorphins pumping. Madewell, Topshop, the usual suspects. The trick is just not hitting the checkout button, ya know?
  • A recent eppy of Throwing Shade, featuring Ronna Glickman (aka Jessica Chaffin) was absolutely incredible. Boston accents forever. I’m totally gonna buy Girl Scout Cookies from that woke-ass child.
  • It’s International Women’s Day, honey! I’m celebrating by building a shrine to this tweet from the incomparable Roxane Gay. If you don’t own/haven’t read everything she’s ever published, get the hell out of here and take care of that, will you?

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P.S. I just bought myself this jumpsuit as a consolation (Insiders, Muses, & Icons have a discount right now, nbd), so is it really all that bad? Also, think I snagged the last medium #sorrynotsorry.

xoxo,

c

Pod-Party Part Trois!

It’s becoming deeply apparent that all I care about is podcasts. Free entertainment constantly at my fingertips? I’m a comedy junkie/nerd, so podcasts are an amazing way to get my fix without parking myself in front of the TV. I feel like I’m never not learning!

2 Dope Queens

2dq_1400x1400_nownycstudios_22 Dope Queens is tied with I Seem Fun for my absolute favorite podcast currently in existence. Hosted by Phoebe Robinson & Jessica Williams (of Daily Show fame), 2 Dope Queens is a stand-up showcase framed by Pheebs and Jessica’s banter. This podcast makes me laugh out loud while I’m alone. I’m sure other drivers on the road think I’m demented. I admire Phoebe & Jessica so much for the amazing successes they’ve had in their careers at such young ages (Jessica isn’t even 30 yet, y’all!) They are hilarious, badass women and they drink rosé out of champagne flutes that say “White Male Tears”. #stayhydrated 

I wish them many more seasons of success! I’ve discovered some of my new favorite comedians on 2DQ, like Jo Firestone and Jordan Carlos, and gotten to bask in the glory of some that I’ve long loved, like Gabe Liedman and Jen Kirkman.

Sooo Many White Guys

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SMWG is Phoebe Robinson’s other podcast, which wrapped its first season this summer. The mission statement, I assume, was for Phoebe to host an interview podcast that *gasp* only had non-white-guy guests! Notable guests include Gina Rodriguez (the queen of my heart), Roxane Gay (my fucking idol), Constance Wu, and Ilana Glazer. Each episode runs between 30 & 40 minutes, so it’s a perfect commuter pod. The women are hilarious AF but don’t shy away from getting into deep discussions about race & gender. The last ep of the season featured Mike Birbiglia, amazing human and token white guy! This is a must-binge pod.

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I’ve been reading the Savage Love column since, well, since I was way too young to be reading the Savage Love column. It’s printed in a *free* local Boston Arts paper, The Dig, which I always grabbed to read on the T in my younger days when I actually spent time in the city. Dan Savage has been a better resource on sex than my high school sex ed class, my parents, Tumblr, and actual field experience combined. What makes the podcast deeply compelling, aside from his thoughtful advice, are the top-of-show political rants and his amazing guests, many of whom are sex workers or porn performers. Without the Savage Lovecast, I wouldn’t have even known about California’s Prop 60 (vote no, y’all!)

The Lovecast comes in 2 sizes, Micro (with ads) and Magnum (ad-free, with more content). I’ve been slumming it with the Micro, but I may be upgrading because I can’t get enough!

Follow Dan on social media @fakedansavage.

Slate’s Dear Prudence

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Dear Prudence is a podcast hosted by my most favorite internet person, Mallory Ortberg. Mallory and Nicole Cliffe ran The Toast for several years, and have cemented their places in an esoteric feminist niche that wholly appeals to me. Even though The Toast shuttered in July, it’s worth perusing their archives. Some of the best #content on the internet.

The PrudiePod gives me the weekly dose of Mallory that I’ve so sorely missed. Amazing guest hosts include her mother and sister, as well as the ever-amazing Carvell Wallace. Mallory’s top and bottom-of-the-show rants sustain me.

Follow Mallory on social media @mallelis, and buy her hysterical book Texts from Jane Eyre here.

The Nerdist

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The Nerdist podcast is an interview show, hosted by Chris Hardwick (@midnight, The Talking Dead). Apparently he’s been doing it for 6 years! There are literally hundreds of episodes, so I obviously haven’t listened to all of them, but I have (predictably) listened to Jen Kirkman, Emily V. Gordon, and Samantha Bee’s episodes.

I didn’t listen to this podcast at first because, frankly, the whole “Nerdist” culture never appealed to me. I also find it ridiculous that The Walking Dead has a companion show. It’s not a good show. I don’t watch it because I don’t need to watch gratuitous violence, but my husband has seen every episode, and at this point he’s hate-watching. Can’t wait until zombies fade out like vampires did two years ago.

BUT, rant aside, Hardwick is a great interviewer and solid comedian. His most recent special, Funcomfortable, was a joy from start to finish (and you guys know that I don’t even care about white male comics, so that’s high praise). I look forward to many more car-rides with this awesome pod!

The Wilder Podcast

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The Wilder Podcast is a brand-new podcast hosted by Karsyn Dupree of Wildernessa (formerly Blissbranch). I discovered Karsyn a few years ago via the Instagrams of the Dupree sisters (of Eisley fame). Her personal story (unrelated to all things Eisley) and unconventional life path are so inspiring! I’m really digging the music she and her husband, Collin, have been putting out, so I was excited when she announced that she was doing a podcast! With the exception of Sherri Dupree-Bemis, I hadn’t actually heard of any of her guests, but they’ve been super engaging. They range from health coaches, to motivational speakers, to podcasters and authors. I love tuning in every week to hear badass ladies doin’ for themselves!

Follow Karsyn on social media @wldrnessa & @karsynkdupree.

You Made It Weird

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You Made It Weird is another Nerdist podcast hosted by one of the best guys in the universe, Pete Holmes. Pete, affectionately referred to in my house as Petey, is one of my favorite comedians and all-around thinkers. I genuinely feel that he’s a modern-day philosopher. He is brilliant. We were robbed of his TBS late-night show after only one season, because the world is a dark and unjust cavern of misery.

YMIW is super-duper long, like 2+ hours long, so it’s definitely a plane-ride pod. Amazing guests include Reggie Watts (literally the messiah in my household), Bo Burnham, Aparna Nancherla, and John Mulaney.

Gilmore Guys

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To be fair, I haven’t listened to every episode of Gilmore Guys. There are a LOT of them. In fact, they just recorded the very last one, for s7e22 of the show. But Gilmore Girls is my favorite show, so anything devoted to it deserves at least a listen. The premise is that Kevin is a long-time fan and Demi has never seen an episode in his life. They’ve been watching an episode a week for the past 2 years and recording a show devoted to each episode. They’ve had tons of cast members (Liza Weil! Scott Patterson! Sean Gunn!) on the pod, and they’ve gained quite a following. They even guested on an ep of my favorite educational podcast, Stuff Mom Never Told You. I can’t wait to go deep on this podcast on my next flight or long commute!

With Her

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And of course, I couldn’t NOT mention that Hillary Clinton has a podcast! Okay, it’s not hosted by Hillary (she ain’t got time for that!), but it’s about her and the campaign. I haven’t gotten a chance to listen to every episode, but the Bill Clinton one was marvelous. Bill could narrate the process of making toast and I’d listen. I such a rabid fan of Hillary Clinton, her policies, and her message. Voting for her with FERVOR tomorrow, and I suggest you all do the same. #yourprotestvoteisboring 

BONUS CONTENT (Can’t Get Enough)

I Seem Fun: The Diary of Jen Kirkman Podcast is currently semi-weekly! She has graced us with an additional half-hour of #content, called This Week Seemed Fun! It’s all the news stories that matter to Jen, and since I sometimes deeply feel like her millenial avatar, which I’m sure would horrify her, it’s all the news stories that matter to me. She’s been reading political articles at the end of her regular Tuesday show, so this is, to some degree, a continuation of that, except with aliens! Can’t wait for her Netflix special, Just Keep Livin’?, to premiere in early 2017!

So, what are you guys even doing with yourselves if you’re not listening to podcasts? Until next post, have fun!

**all images via the linked websites for each podcast

 

@DOPEQUEENPHEEBS

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image via Amazon

I almost don’t want to write anything about this incredible book, because how could my words do it justice? Phoebe Robinson’s You Can’t Touch My Hair (And Other Things I Still Have to Explain) is required reading (foreword by Jessica Williams, heyyy). My new life goal is to convince as many white guys as I possibly can to read it. I honestly think that, unless they are some woke-ass dudes that campaign for Hillary and listen to 2 Dope Queens in their spare time, there are lessons in this book that they most definitely need to learn.

You Can’t Touch My Hair, Pheebs’ ode to the experiences of black women, opens the door to what she calls “Black People Secrets” in order to present herself, and all black women, as the multi-faceted people that they truly are when unbound by harmful stereotypes such as the “Angry Black Woman Myth.” The book playfully and humorously exposes the ways in which women of color fight discrimination on multiple fronts. I mean, shoot, she gets attitude about her favorite band being U2, but no one questions my devotion to Kendrick Lamar? Ra ci sm. All joking aside, Phoebe tackles this unsavory topic with such finesse that by the end of the book, you’re cry-laughing and toppling the patriarchy simultaneously.

This book could not have arrived at a more appropriate time. Just a month out from the 2016 Presidential Election, the rhetoric surrounding race, gender, and sexual violence are as nasty and divisive as they have ever been (thanks, Twitter). I have seen Facebook comment sections that literally have comments reading, “UGH there is no such fucking thing as white male privilege.” LI TER AL LY this was a thing I actually read. I have to believe (for my sanity) that these comments are the products of sheer ignorance and not malice. I understand that, to a poorly educated (and by “poorly educated” I don’t necessarily mean not-having-attended-college so shush) white man existing in a situation that doesn’t exude privilege (i.e. financial not-so-good times, temporary layoffs, scratchin’ and survivin’) it can seem like he lacks the mystical pot-o-gold called “white male privilege.” But privilege is not the same as fortune. It is a privilege to drive a car in this country (not a right), but no one hands you a Tesla along with your renewed ID. (Men like cars, right? This is a thing?)

When faced with the realities of the disproportionate incarceration of people of color, the many recent fatal police shootings, and the appalling lack of representation of people (especially women) of color in positions of authority and in the government, the above understanding of privilege becomes even more crucial. If white men (and women, let’s be fair) can use this knowledge critically, they will learn that they have nothing to lose and everything to gain by hearing and valuing the stories of people of color.

This post was supposed to be about Phoebe’s book and not my #feels, but as they say the personal is political. Phoebe (loosely) frames the book’s narrative around hair, and throughout, hair becomes a beautiful metaphor. Hair is other. Hair is unique. Hair is something seemingly universal (almost everybody grows it, right?) that can impede or empower. Hair is heavily racially coded. Maybe if we can understand the implications of that, we can look at the bigger picture and move forward as a nation. Maybe this just reads like a feminist Twitter thread. Who knows?

Anyway, tl;dr, Phoebe’s book is a modern masterpiece and you should purchase it with money and then build an altar around it. Love you, mean it.

—DellaBites

Read an actual review of this book here. Order Pheebs’ book on Amazon here, listen to 2 Dope Queens here, listen to Sooo Many White Guys here, and follow her on all the social media @dopequeenpheebs.

Pod-Party Part 2!

Podcasts have become basically the most important part of my life, you guys. I hunger for more! But the two that I’ve fallen for in a big, big way since I wrote about this last are SMNTY & WTF. Acronyms!

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SMNTY stands for Stuff Mom Never Told You. It’s run by two dope queens (but not those 2 Dope Queens…), Cristen and Caroline. So far I’ve listened to the episodes on A Practical Wedding, A Feminist Marriage, Lady Libido Liberation, and the trope Lesbian Bed Death. This show is like having a conversation with your best friend (if you happen to be a woke-ass lady with woke-ass friends). It’s so refreshing to hear this sort of talk outside of the classroom. I try my damnedest to approach everything in life through an intersectional feminist lens, so hearing the voices of like-minded individuals is reaffirming. They recently did a series on rom-coms that I can’t wait to listen to!

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WTF stands, of course, for exactly what you think it stands for. Hosted by Marc Maron, who is one of my favorite comedians, WTF has some of the best guests in the game. Joanna NewsomAbbi & Ilana. Natasha Leggero. Ali Wong. It’s ENDLESS. Maron the show is based on his experiences doing the pod, and believe me, there’s enough material. WTF goes deep. I especially appreciate that Maron talks about his experiences as a man with an eating disorder, because that’s a large subset of the population that gets NO attention. As someone who has experienced disordered eating and still struggles, the episode with Nikki Glaser really spoke to me. I listened to it today, and it struck a damn chord. I was never in real physical danger (thankfully), but the mental state that accompanies eating disorders and food issues is intense, and it can manifest dangerously in a lot of other ways—reckless behavior, drinking, drugs, etc.

Oh gosh, look at me. Tryna talk about podcasts and delving into the darkness of eating disorders. For another day and another post.

Podcasts, man. As I’ve described them to my dad, it’s like NPR all day but 100% interesting all the time. But alas, my dad still doesn’t know what podcasts are. I’m not even sure he truly understands what an mp3 is. Either way, I’m so glad I discovered this *free* form of entertainment, finally!

Seriously, though: what pods should I be listening to??

—DellaBites